经济大萧条期间，有天一个男人走进一间酒吧。他走上前去对酒保说，“酒保，我想请大家喝一轮。”
酒保说，“可以，但我们现在正处在萧条期间，所以我得先看到钱。”
那人抽出一大卷钞票，并把它们放到吧台上。酒保不可置信地看着。于是，他问道，“你是在哪儿搞到这么多钱的？”
男人回答说，“我是个职业赌徒。”
酒保说，“根本没这样的好事！我是说 ，你最多只有50%的成功率吧，对吧？”
赌徒说，“唔，我只压确定的事。”
酒保问道，“像什么样的事呢？”
他说，“嗯，比如，我跟你赌50美元，我可以咬我的右眼。”
酒保想了会，然后说，“好吧”
接着，赌徒掏出他右边的义眼，然后咬住。酒保说，“哇靠，你耍我。”然后给了赌徒50美金。
陌生人说道，“我再给你一个机会。我再赌你50美金，我可以咬我的左眼。”
酒保又想了下，然后说，“嗯，我知道你不瞎，我是说，我看着你走到这儿来。我加入这个赌局。”然后，赌徒拿出他的假牙，咬住他的左眼。
“靠，你又耍我！”酒保抗议道。
赌徒说，“这就是为什么我赢这么多钱的原因。酒保，我不要那50美金，给我一瓶你们这最好的苏格兰威士忌。”
赌徒拿着酒走到后面的房间，然后整夜？和一些当地人玩起牌来。数小时的酗酒和玩牌之后，他费劲地走到吧台。喝得酩酊大醉的他说，“酒保，我再给你最后一次机会。我跟你赌500美元，我可以单脚站在这个吧台上然后尿到你后面那个架子上的威士忌瓶里还一滴不漏。”
酒保再次地考虑起这个赌局。这家伙根本两只脚都站不直，更别说少一只。“好吧，我跟你赌。”他说。
赌徒爬上吧台， 单脚站立，开始朝各处撒尿。尿到吧台上，酒保和他自己身上，但却一滴都没尿到那威士忌瓶里。
酒保狂喜，大笑道，“嘿，伙计，你欠我500美元！”
赌徒爬下吧台说，“可以啊，我刚刚跟那边牌局的每个人都赌了1000块，说我可以尿到吧台和你身上，然后还能让你大笑！”
译文：
During the Great Depression, there was a man who walked into a bar one day. He went up to the bartender and said, “Bartender, I’d like to buy the house a round of drinks.”The bartender said, “That’s fine, but we’re in the middle of the Depression, so I’ll need to see some money first.”The guy pulled out a huge wad of bills and set them on the bar. The bartender can’t believe what he’s seeing. “Where did you get all that money?” asked the bartender.
”I’m a professional gambler,” replied the man.
The bartender said, “There’s no such thing! I mean, your odds are fifty-fifty at best, right?””Well, I only bet on sure things,” said the guy.
”Like what?” asked the bartender.
”Well, for example, I’ll bet you fifty dollars that I can bite my right eye,” he said.
The bartender thought about it. “Okay,” he said.
So, the guy pulled out his false right eye and bit it. “Aw, you screwed me,” said the bartender, and paid the guy his $50.
”I’ll give you another chance. I’ll bet you another fifty dollars that I can bite my left eye,” said the stranger.
The bartender thought again and said, “Well, I know you’re not blind, I mean, I watched you walk in here. I’ll take that bet.” So, the guy pulled out his false teeth and bit his left eye.
”Aw, you screwed me again!” protested the bartender.
”That’s how I win so much money, bartender. I’ll just take a bottle of your best scotch in lieu of the fifty dollars,” said the man.
With that, the guy went to the back room and spent the better part of the night playing cards with some of the locals. After many hours of drinking and card playing, he stumbled up to the bar. Drunk as a skunk, he said, “Bartender, I’ll give you one last chance. I’ll bet you five hundred dollars that I can stand on this bar on one foot and piss into that whiskey bottle on that shelf behind you without spilling a drop.”The bartender once again pondered the bet. The guy couldn’t even stand up straight on two feet, much less one. “Okay, you’re on,” he said.
The guy climbed up on the bar, stood on one leg, and began pissing all over the place. He hit the bar, the bartender, himself, but not a drop made it into the whiskey bottle.
The bartender was ecstatic. Laughing, the bartender said, “Hey pal, you owe me five hundred dollars!”The guy climbed down off the bar and said, “That’s okay. I just bet each of the guys in the card room a thousand bucks each that I could piss all over you and the bar and still make you laugh!”